雅思小作文线图不写交点能考到7.5分吗?

如果你在以前问我,我会跟你说:太难了,别这样写。‍‍‍‍‍看看这个题目:C17Test4 The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.在我之前为这个题写的解析中,提到了3个交点:

雅思小作文线图不写交点能考到7.5分吗?

开店和关店数量大小关系发生变化的年份(交点)包括2012, 2015, 2016。‍‍‍‍在我常年的雅思写作教学中,线图有交点,肯定是要写的。比如C7Test2的考官范文节选:

雅思小作文线图不写交点能考到7.5分吗?

The consumption of chicken, on the other hand, showed an upward trend, overtaking that of lamb in 1980 and that of beef in 1989.而且句式很简单,就是在写趋势的时候,用现在分词做状语加入超过。但是,看到C17Test4的范文,我大跌眼镜。

官方7.5分考生范文

The line graph shows trends in shop closures and openings of new shops in a particular country between the years 2011 and 2018.In 2011 approximately 6,400 shops closed. The number of closures fluctuated over the next four years until 2015, when there was a dramatic fall in closures to roughly 700 shops. The following year the number of shops closing their doors rose sharply, reaching over 5,000. The figures remained steady for the next two years, with just over 5,000 closures in 2018.The number of new shops opening decreased dramatically between 20111 (approximately 8,500) and 2012 (just under 4,000) but rebounded by roughly 50% by 2014. In 2015, the number of openings then fell to the 2012 level, but remained stable for the next two years. The last recorded year, 2018, saw a further fall to 3,000 new openings, the lowest point in this seven year period.Overall, the number of shop closures has remained within the 5,000 to 7,000 range (with the exception of 2015). In contrast, new shop openings have shown a wider range of figures, but generally indicate a downward trend over the same period.

虽然我看得出ta的英语水平很好,擅长写作,但是ta确实没有写交点‍‍‍几乎就是2条线(开店数量和关店数量)各写各的,仅仅在overall段做了简单的比较。

得到的评语如下:‍‍‍This is a strong response which provides a clear overview in the final paragraph. Data is presented and key features are highlighted appropriately.

一时间让我对自己的雅思写作教学感到迷茫。因为我一直以来对学生的要求是“面面俱到”——既要争取4条评分标准中词汇和语法的分,也要争取TA和CC的分。

‍‍‍‍‍‍在实际教学中,1 如果学生写线图不写交点,我肯定要揪着不放,强制加入;‍‍‍‍2 我也在批改其他老师的学生的作文时,因为没有写交点而严厉扣分。‍‍‍我的考虑是,词汇和语法,绝大多数学生分数的上限是7分,然而TA和CC往往都是5分(主要因为comparisons写不全),这样得到的最终分数就是6分。

所以,通过要求他们写全小作文的comparisons提升TA的分,就显得很重要。直到看到这篇7.5分范文,现在我乐意告诉学生:如果你英语水平真的很好,擅长小作文写作,其实简化作文,少写comparisons(比如不写交点),同样可以把小作文考到7.5分。‍‍

每一次《剑桥雅思》出了新书,都有人说:又来圈钱了。‍‍‍其实,每一本书给出的范文(考官或者学生的),都可以给我们很多启示。

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